it's christmas time!

in our house, the holidays mean many things, but the first sign of christmas is the arrival of curtis, our elf on the shelf!

he showed up this year while we were in gulf shores, alabama for thanksgiving. we had a great time in gluf shores. our beach house was right on the beach. morgan loved playing in the sand, looking for seashells and "muscles" and getting in the water a little bit. i really didn't take any pictures though! i did get one of our beach house - ours is the third from the right. we stayed there with bo's family - his parents, grandparents, sister, aunt, uncle and cousins. it was really fun and relaxing!

another sign of christmas is the tree. we put ours up 2 weeks before thanksgiving because we knew we would be out of town on thanksgiving and morgan was out of town the weekend before thanksgiving.

since we don't have a fireplace, i have to get creative with our stockings....

morgan is so excited about christmas this year. it makes it so much fun! so far, we have been to the christmas parade, breakfast with santa and morgan's christmas program at school. at breakfast with santa, morgan sat on santa's lap and was just mesmerized by him. she kept looking at him and smiling. she planned to tell him that she wanted a baby doll and a bike, but i think she only said baby doll because she was so nervous and excited!

bo also makes christmas very fun - he wants morgan to have a ton of presents under the tree. he keeps counting what we've gotten and saying that it's not enough, she needs more! on christmas, i'll take a pic of them and of santa's presents too.

i am so blessed to have a husband who sees the value in making each holiday special and fun for morgan. i hope she has great memories of family traditions that she will continue when she has a family of her own.

a wedding and a new addition!

well, june was a busy month in the williams household! my little sister got married! of course morgan was the cutest flower girl ever - and i was the cutest matron of honor (the only matron of honor, actually!)

the wedding was in new orleans, and we went down there thursday night because the bridesmaids luncheon was friday morning. while i was hanging out with the girls, bo took morgan to the aquarium of the americas. bo said it was REALLY crowded, but, as luck would have it, they ran into my brother and nephews while they were there.

here's mo making a silly face!

oh, and i have to share the cutest picture. morgan LOVES "cousin nathan" and wanted to dance with him at the reception all night. he didn't want to do it, but i offered him a dollar to dance whenever she wanted to. he did, and he earned that dollar!

and as for the new addition to our family, NO, it's not a baby! you may know that we got a kitten last summer. we named her tessa. she was such a cute kitten! we had her fixed and declawed and were content with just one pet. but she got really sick - and we had to have her put down. morgan still talks about tessa and has been asking for another kitten. well, bo's sister allison's cat got "knocked up" and had 7 kittens in may. we decided to get two this time, so they could play with each other during the day while we are gone.


we had planned to get a girl and a boy (so bo wouldn't be the only male in the house anymore!) and were going to name them lucy and desi. when the time came to get the kittens, the only 2 big enough to leave the momma were both girls. so we named them lucy and layla. we got them while morgan was out of town so we could suprise her when she got home. when we picked her up, we told her we had a suprise for her. she said "is it a hippopotumas?" bo and i both started laughing and said that a hippo was a little too big for the house. she said "no, i meant a stuffed one!" she went on to guess a few more things - shoes, baby doll, candy...but never guessed kittens.



so she was very suprised when we got home!

and i think the kittens were suprised too! morgan loves them, but i'm sure drives them crazy! she wants to be wherever they are and is constantly picking them up, moving them and sometimes dropping them. i know they are happy when we leave for work/school in the mornings!

morgan is out of town for this week :-( so maybe i'll have time for another post before she gets back!

i know i said i wouldn't post about relationships...

but i am.

i have always hated adultery, infidelity, cheating...whatever you want to call it. but before it happened to me, i never understood how it happens, why it happens and how devastating it is. i also didn't know that it can be prevented.

the reason i felt the need to write this post at this time is seeing several people in my life experience this pain in the last year. i never realized how widespread infidelity was.

once it has happened, you can recover from it - i do believe that. (see http://www.marraigebuilders.com/) but nothing in your life will ever be the same. i wish that no one would ever have to experience the pain that i, and so many others, have had to experience. and i wish that i was in a position to help people prevent it. this is my only platform to possibly help someone, so i'm gonna put what i know out there. if even one person somewhere is spared this terrible pain by putting my words into practice, i will feel successful. although i (and that person) may never know that an affair has been prevented, i still want to try.


you may be thinking this doesn't apply to you. but if you are married, or ever plan to be married it does. if you think "it can't happen to me" that is your first mistake. it may very well never happen to you, but you need to be aware that it can. on a side note, i really hate to use the phrase "happen to you" b/c it sounds like it's no one's fault. adultery doesn't just happen. it is a selfish, irresponsible action done by someone. a terrible pain inflicted on one's family.


so anyway, most everything i know about affairs and how they start and why they start can be found on http://www.marriagebuilders.com/ - it's defintely worth the time to check the site out and educate yourself...if i had only known then what i know now, i could have nipped it in the bud before it ever started! not that i would want to change the past or change where i am today, but for someone who may be able to prevent this heartache for themselves, that site is a must-read.

one of the primary ideas on MB is the idea of emotional needs and a love bank. according to dr. harley, everyone has a "love bank" for each person in their lives. when someone's love bank maintains a consistenly high level, it causes you to feel love for that person. and ideally, the love bank you have with your spouse will always have the highest balance of all of your love banks. but what usually happens in affair situations is that the spouse makes more withdrawals than deposits. this can happen over time when you start to neglect your spouse's needs. you get caught up in the demands of your career and your children. you don't take time to make your spouse feel special and loved. you assume your spouse knows you love him/her and understands that you are extremely busy. in short, you take your spouse for granted (or he/she takes you for granted). then along comes mr or miss "makes me feel important". this person doesn't have to worry about whether the kids are sick, making the mortgage payment on time, or why you still haven't fixed that leaky sink. this person makes plenty of deposits in your "love bank" b/c yall seem to have so much in common and he/she always makes you feel good. in turn, you make deposits into this person's love bank and over time, you both start to feel "love" for each other.

i think you can see where that scenario is going.

so, in order to prevent your spouse from being vulnerable to an affair, you need to keep the love bank full. the primary way to make deposits into someone's love bank is to do things that fulfill their top 3 (or so) emotional needs (EN). dr harley defines an emotional need as " a craving that, when satisfied, leaves you with a feeling of happiness and contentment, and, when unsatisfied, leaves you with a feeling of unhappiness and frustration. "
the 10 primary emotional needs that dr harley identifies are:

• affection
• sexual fulfillment
• conversation
• recreational companionship
• honesty and openness
• physical attractiveness
• financial support
• domestic support
• family commitment
• admiration

please follow this link http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3300_needs.html to find descriptions of these needs and how to meet these needs. you will also find a link to an emotional needs questionnaire which you can print out (2 copies) so you and your spouse can identify your top emotional needs and begin to make an effort to fulfill those.

in my opinion, this topic is important for all married people. bo and i are both very aware of each others needs and make an effort to fulfill them. it's not only for people whose marriages are in trouble. it's for anyone who is married, who wants to stay married and wants to be as happy as possible in their marriage.

good luck making your marriage as fulfilling as God intended it to be!

happy "mudders" day!

morgan's class had their mother's day breakfast this morning. they sang a song for us and chose our breakfast foods...which consisted of several different types of donuts and some apple slices. then miss mandy read the book "i love you forever" and the kids knew some of the words. the book is so sweet, i was worried i might tear up, but i managed to hold it together!

morgan's teacher (who we love!) helped the kids make mother's day cards. she asked them the following questions:

all about mom

1. what is mom's name? ashley

2. how old is mom? 28

3. what does daddy call mom? boo

4. what does mom do at work? get money

5. what do you and mom do for fun? go to wal mart

6. what do you want to say to mom on mother's day? "give me some food"


i think it will be a cute keepsake to remind me of this age...
they also made a cute little flower pot and gave us a packet of sunflower seeds. we'll see if anything grows!

all because two people fell in love...

bo and i have been married for one year this sunday. most people say that the first year of marraige is the hardest, but for us it's been pretty easy. i never realized how fulfiling and fun marriage can be. this truly has been the best year of both of our lives. bo always puts me and morgan ahead of himself. he is proud of our home and our family. i feel so blessed to have found the perfect mate for me. and while most couples can hardly believe they've been married a year, bo and i both agree it seems like we've been married a year or longer ~ but in a good way! so much has happened this past year. we have bought our first home together, and spent months painting it (well, i didn't actually paint - bo and his dad did). we've both gotten new (used) vehicles, and morgan has almost completed her first year of 3k.


another big change in our life has been losing weight. bo decided in november that he wanted to lose a few pounds. and of course i wanted to lose weight too, so i suggested we start weight watchers.

when we first started, i was hoping to lose about 5 pounds, which would get me back to my pre-pregnancy weight. (3 years after giving birth!) but it came off so easily i didn't want to quit there! as people started to notice my weight loss and my clothes all got too big, i got even more inspired. to date, i've lost 26 pounds and am wearing between a 4 and a 6. i'm extremely happy as i was in a 10 before we started.

one thing i didn't realize when i was overweight was how bad it made me feel. i always felt embarassed to meet new people or to see old friends. i was ashamed of how i looked. but i didn't really realize how much until i had lost the weight. thanks to my wonderful husband's support, i am now more confident and happier than ever before. every aspect of my life is better now. and while i still miss eating certain things from time to time, i get to enjoy my new body every day. every morning when i step on the scale, i am happy. when i get dressed i am reminded of how far i have come. no food has ever made me feel this good!


i do want to brag on my husband a little bit more. he is an amazing father to morgan. he loves her just as much as he would if she were biologically his child. i am very happy and proud when morgan says that she wants to marry her daddy bo. i am so glad that i am giving her a father figure that she can look to as an example when she looks for a mate. he loves and protects both of us and i hope that morgan will have extremely high standards when choosing a husband.

God has richly blessed my family and i wake up every day happy to be me!

do we look alike?

growing up, everybody always told me that my sister and i looked just alike...many people thought we were twins (she's 2 years younger) . now, everybody says how much morgan looks like me...and i do remember when morgan was born i thought she looked more like april than me...so i know there is must be a resemblance....



so, what do you think?
april, morgan, me

weekend fun

a couple of weeks ago, we went down to visit my parents in clinton. morgan LOVES her grammy, grandaddy and cousins so much, it's like i'm not even there!

since morgan slept with grammy and grandaddy, bo and i were able to get up early and go to the gym (at the healthplex) and get back home before morgan even woke up. then we went shopping in flowood. we had 3 main goals with this shopping trip: to buy size 6 jeans for me (yippee!!!), to find some diet cherry 7 up, and to eat at ichiban - bo's favorite, since they have all you can eat sushi!

so we got the jeans and checked target and kroger for the diet cherry 7 up...neither had it. then went to ichiban - bo ate about 20 pieces of sushi and i discovered that ichiban has my beloved "pink sauce" that kyotos serves. so all i ate was rice and pink sauce - soooo good!!

we continued our quest for the diet cherry 7 up by going to the other target and the walmart and kroger in clinton, all to no avail.

when we got back to my parents house, morgan was playing outside with "cousin nathan" and christian. she calls him "cousin nathan" so not to confuse him with her boyfriend nathan.

here are some pics of them playing

bo recently got a blackberry and he took some video of morgan playing. i don't know how to post video yet, but i did get a picture of bo showing morgan the video on his phone. i thought it was so sweet!

and now some more pics of our sweet girl